Bullying in the Workplace – Bad Bosses and Hostile Work Environments

Bullying in the Workplace – Bad Bosses and Hostile Work Environments

Bullying in the Workplace – Bad Bosses and Hostile Work Environments

Maybe you experienced bullying as a child in school. Bullying in schools was, and is still common place in some institutions. If so, those are memories you would likely prefer to leave behind. This might not be possible if you face a hostile work environment due to bullying at work. Are you being bullied at work? Many people are dealing with bullying at work on a daily basis, and don’t know where to turn for help. Don’t be ashamed, as it is not your fault. You are not responsible for someone else’s behaviour. Maybe you have even asked yourself whether you should stay or whether you should go. Is it time to move on and work with another organization? Don’t leave the organization yet, necessarily.

What is workplace bullying? What is workplace harassment? 

How does one define bullying in the workplace?

Bullying is an aggressive act, meant to destabilize and reduce the power of another, leaving the victim feeling isolated, rejected and hurt. Unfortunately for some people, they might experience bullying later on in adult life in the context of working relationships. Workplace bullying “usually involves repeated incidents or a pattern of behaviour that is intended to intimidate, offend, degrade or humiliate a particular person or group of people.[1]”

Although the title of the article is, “I have a bad boss”, workplace harassment takes place between all types of relationships in the workplace, between customers and employees, employees against other employees, and even employees against managers at times.

What is workplace harassment? What constitutes bullying at work?

Workplace harassment is basically the same as workplace bullying, except harassment is the legal term for offensive and/or hurtful behaviour that is unwanted and often repetitive in nature. This term might be important depending on where you live, and where you work, as the definition might be used to determine whether the behaviour itself if considered harassment. If it is, then you might be able to take recourse during those legislative schemes or administrative bodies. If not, you might need to try other approaches to dealing with the harassment.

Is bullying at work illegal?

In some jurisdictions, workplace harassment is indeed illegal, and is explicitly covered in workplace-related legislation. Ask your government ministry of employment and/or workplace compensation board to learn more about the legalities around appropriate workplace behaviour and workplace harassment. You might also have civil recourses through the courts, and/or recourse if the behaviour is viewed as a form of criminal harassment. In that sense, might consider reaching out to your local police station, say the harassment is serious. Read about the difference between reporting harassment in the workplace and to the police. 

Definition of Workplace Bullying in the UK

According to the UK Advisory, Conciliation and Arbitration Service (ACAS):
Bullying is "offensive, intimidating, malicious or insulting behaviour, an abuse or misuse of power through means that undermine, humiliate, denigrate or injure the recipient."

Definition of Workplace Bullying in Australia

According to Safe Work Australia, a statutory agency, workplace bullying is defined as
"repeated and unreasonable behaviour directed toward a worker or group of workers that creates a risk to health and safety".

The Government of Western Australia Chamber of Commerce said:
"Bullying in the workplace may be described as repeated inappropriate behaviour that can occur at work and/or in the course of employment. It may be direct or indirect, verbal or physical, or some form of negative interaction between one or more persons against another or others. Bullying behaviour can be regarded as undermining an individual's right to dignity at work."

The Australian Human Rights Commission said one definition is:
“the repeated less favourable treatment of a person by another or others in the workplace, which may be considered unreasonable and inappropriate workplace practice. It includes behaviour that intimidates, offends, degrades or humiliates a worker”.

Definition of Workplace Bullying in New Zealand

"Bullying may be seen as something that someone repeatedly does or says to gain power and dominance over another, including any action or implied action, such as threats, intended to cause fear and distress.” Evans v Gen-i Limited unreported, D King, 29 August 2005, AA 333/05. 

Definition of Workplace Bullying in the United States

The Washington State Department of Labor & Industries:

"Workplace bullying refers to repeated, unreasonable actions of individuals (or a group) directed towards an employee (or a group of employees), which are intended to intimidate, degrade, humiliate, or undermine; or which create a risk to the health or safety of the employee(s)."

Definition of Workplace Harassment in Canada

Treasury Board Secretariat - Federal Public Service workers

Under the Policy on Harassment Prevention and Resolution, harassment is defined as: "improper conduct by an individual, that is directed at and offensive to another individual in the workplace, including at any event or any location related to work, and that the individual knew or ought reasonably to have known would cause offence or harm. 

It comprises objectionable act(s), comment(s) or display(s) that demean, belittle, or cause personal humiliation or embarrassment, and any act of intimidation or threat. It also includes harassment within the meaning of the Canadian Human Rights Act (i.e. based on race, national or ethnic origin, colour, religion, age, sex, sexual orientation, marital status, family status, disability and pardoned conviction)."

Quebec Commission des Normes du Travail - Quebec workers

"Psychological harassment at work is vexatious behaviour in the form of repeated conduct, verbal comments, actions or gestures: that are hostile or unwanted, that affect the employee’s dignity or psychological or physical integrity, that make the work environment harmful."

Ontario

The Occupational Health and Safety Act defines workplace harassment as "engaging in a course of vexatious comment or conduct against a worker in a workplace that is known or ought reasonably to be known to be unwelcome."

This definition of workplace harassment is broad enough to include harassment prohibited under the Ontario Human Rights Code, as well as "psychological harassment" or "personal harassment."

Some of the types of harassment that workers could experience in the workplace include sexual harassment, teasing, intimidating or offensive jokes or innuendos, display or circulation of offensive pictures or materials, unwelcome, offensive, or intimidating phone calls, or bullying. Leering, unwelcome gifts or attention, offensive gestures, or spreading rumours could also be considered harassment.

Types of workplace harassment? Examples of workplace harassment. 

What does workplace bullying and harassment look like?

Bullying can take many forms, from subtle moves to isolate someone to overt acts of aggression. Some examples include spreading hurtful rumours and gossip about others that isn’t true, intimidating someone, undermining someone’s work on purpose, threatening or abusing someone, removing someone’s responsibilities without reason, changing work guidelines constantly, making offensive jokes that are obvious, yelling, belittling someone, tampering with someone’s personal items or equipment, intruding on someone’s privacy, or making someone feel excluded or unwanted.[2] Even email bullying at work might take place, which might include any threatening behaviour over email. All of these behaviours demean someone, and over time, might erode their self-esteem and trust in themselves and trust in others. It also creates an unhealthy work environment, whereby the victim and other team members might start to fear confrontation or simply coming into work at all.

How does bullying start?

Bullying might start for varying reasons. Maybe someone has anger management problems and fails to address their anger effectively, taking it out on others. Maybe someone was bullied at another time in their life, and they are re-living the pattern – maybe they do not realize the true impact of their behaviour. Maybe the person has a personality type that makes it more difficult to empathize with others. But remember, it doesn’t matter that much why it started, it just matters that you are addressing it, so that it stops. These reasons do not excuse someone’s destructive behaviour. You still need to set boundaries.

Impact and consequences of workplace bullying

Workplace bullying hurts people, the team and the organization. The human impacts include frustration, helplessness, decreased confidence, anxiety, family tension, low morale and more.[3]

Workplace bullying also hurts your organization or company. Impacts include, increased turnover, costs to workplace health programs, increased risk to workplace incidents, decreased productivity, compromised corporate brand and decreased customer service quality.[4]

How to deal with a bully at work?

If you believe you are a victim of harassment or workplace bullying, also known as office bullying, take some of these steps, and also read out blog about Bullying and Harassment with some tips;

1. Make it clear to the person that their behaviour is unwanted. Have a witness, such as a labour/union representative or human resources officer with you.
2. Document everything, including the date, time and behaviour, the impact on you, the witnesses present and the outcome. If there is written proof, keep this as well.
3. Report each incident to the appropriate person. Seek out the services of an ombudsman, special contact in the organization or human resources.[5] They will be able to provide advice on how to report workplace bullying.
4. Don’t convince yourself that this behaviour is acceptable or somehow warranted by something that you have done. Victims may feel vulnerable and as if they have no option but to remain silent.
5. Take these steps before you decide to quit your job. Although there may be a power imbalance between the victim and the bully, one person or even a group of persons is not necessarily representative of the whole organization.

Read our blog about what an employer can do to address harassment effectively. If you are a witness to workplace harassment, be sure to reach out for support, and follow the above recommendations as well (including documentation and reporting). Thank you for being a self-leader, and helping to contribute to positive change in your organization. Instead of allowing the conflict to escalate negatively, you are resolving the conflict.

Top 7 Tips for Mediators Addressing Workplace Harassment

If you are a mediator, how do you deal with workplace harassment? 

1. Are the clients fully capable and interested in mediating the case? If one of the clients might be emotionally and psychologically struggling, it might be inappropriate to invite them to participate in mediation unless they have approval from their doctor or attending professional;
2. Consider starting your time with the clients as a consultant to discuss their options, and then with conflict coaching so they are empowered to express their concerns when the time for mediation is appropriate. This is likely the best time to have the parties learn about the harassment policy and process, so that their expectations are managed. The truth is, the other person might not be separated (fired), so they might be asked to resolve the conflict with the help of a mediator. Of course, mediation is voluntary, but parties might aim for a collaborative solution, especially if one of the parties says sorry and genuinely will make an effort to improve their behaviour;
3. Before the mediation, ensure that the parties are aware of their rights and obligations. Give them this website to learn more about harassment and boundaries in the workplace. Also, ask the parties if they would like a support person or lawyer present in the sessions, and offer the same to the other party as well;
4. They might not be interested in working face-to-face with the other party, so if they are healthy and very interested in pursuing mediation, offer some alternative approaches, such as shuttle mediation (where the parties are in separate rooms and the mediator goes between each to manage the discussions and negotiation), or invite the parties to sit in the same room, but have them facing other directions;
5. Many parts of the mediation might be similar, whereby the mediator is there to guide discussions in a safe environment with appropriate communication norms, ensuring that both parties are heard and that they are able to find a solution that works for both of them;
6. A big part of the mediation might be future-focused, helping the parties establish new norms for working together. Work with them to come up with some broad norms for their relationship, and then talk through some examples and how they would be applied.
7. Discuss ways in which parties might ask for help or talk to the other person, if there is a ‘relapse’ in behaviour.

Keywords:
 

Types of bullying, bullying and mental health, the bully at work, workplacebullying, types of workplace harassment, intimidation at work, retaliation in the workplace, against bullying, verbal abuse in the workplace.

About the Author - Bullying in the Workplace – Bad Bosses and Hostile Work Environments

Rhema - Legal Dispute Blogger in collaboration with Mediate2go

Rhema Kang is a litigation lawyer. She graduated with an Honours Bachelor of Arts from the University of Toronto in International Relations, and Juris Doctor from the University of Ottawa. She first became excited about mediation while working for the Honourable George W. Adams, a prominent Canadian mediator who handles legal disputes worth up to several hundred million dollars. Rhema was the researcher behind the book, Mediating Justice: Legal Dispute Negotiations, and won second prize in the FMC Negotiation Competition. Rhema enjoys dark chocolate with sea salt and finds it awkward to write about herself in the third person.

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[1] Canadian Centre for Occupational Health and Safety

[2] Canadian Centre for Occupational Health and Safety

[3] Canadian Centre for Occupational Health and Safety

[4] Canadian Centre for Occupational Health and Safety

[5] Canadian Centre for Occupational Health and Safety

Super Powers - Being powerful and resolving conflict in relationships and organizations

Super Powers - Being powerful and resolving conflict in relationships and organizations

"I feel powerless" 
"I want more power and influence"
"I want to be respected"
"I am powerless" 
"I feel scared of asserting myself" 
"I avoid making eye contact"
"Someone embarrassed me at work, and I did nothing"
"We have a workplace bully"

A blog on power by a mediator and conflict coach

Mediate to Go - Super Powers - Being powerful in relationships and organizations

What does power mean to you? Do you feel comfortable using power? Maybe power makes you uncomfortable. Do you avoid eye contact with people? Do you hesitate when making requests of other people? Do you start some of your sentences with “I know this is a stupid question, but…”? Most people don’t realize this, but we exercise power on a daily basis. This blog is all about power in relationships. In order to be an effective self leader in conflict situations, we recommend the use of empowerment. Read more about power below.

Definition of Power

Power is defined as ”The ability to influence the attainment of goals sought by yourself or others.” (J. Dan Rothwell)

Other definitions of power include” the ability to do or act; great or marked ability to do our act; strength; might; force; legal ability, capacity, or authority; the possession of control or command over others; authority.” (Dictionary.com)

Synonyms for power

The items of power include the following: “capability; skill; dynamism; gift; talent; effectiveness; aptitude; efficacy; qualification; influence; potential; virtue.” (Thesaurus.com)

Antonyms for power

Antonyms of power include powerless, ”incapacity; weakness.” (Dictionary.com) “in aptitude; inefficiency; incompetence; uselessness; surrender; yielding; impairment.” (Thesaurus.com)

Introduction to power

In order to effectively resolve conflict,  and to be a self leader in conflict situations, one must learn how to manage their own power and interact with the power of other people. Power is all around us, and is not something that can be avoided. Even if one feels powerlessness, it is not possible to be completely powerless. 

Given our interdependence in human relationships and groups, everyone has some form of influence. (J. Dan Rothwell) That is a form of power. In fact, in order for people and groups to achieve their goals, they must exercise power. (J. Dan Rothwell)

Forms of power

Hollander and Offerman, (1990) explain that there are three forms of power;  dominance, prevention and empowerment.

Dominance

He who has great power should use it lightly.

Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Dominance is a form of competitive power, where someone’s gain is someone else’s loss. This type of power is most obvious in organizations or governments where are hierarchy is present.  Dominance can be exercised within given situations. Sometimes, dominance is Express verbally through interruptions, Contradicting someone else, berating them and monopolizing or dominating discussions. (J. Dan Rothwell)

Prevention

The only power you have is the word no.

Frances McDormand

Prevention is another form of power, which is also competitive in nature. Prevention Power takes place when someone is attempting to react to the power of dominance. Prevention power is common as a form of resistance. (J. Dan Rothwell) In the context of workplace conflict, if you’ve been a manager and your employees have resisted some form of change, this is known as prevention power. If you’ve been an employee, and someone has asked you to do something that goes against your values or the values of the organization, you may have exerted prevention power in managing this conflict.

Empowerment

The purpose of getting power is to be able to give it away.

Aneurin Bevan

Empowerment is much more positive out of all of these forms of power. Empowerment is all about helping others increase their capabilities and improving the influence of both groups and individuals. (J. Dan Rothwell) empowerment is all about collaboration: everyone in the group is given the tools they need to succeed together as a team. Empowerment is seen as a proactive means of helping oneself and others seek their goals. (J. Dan Rothwell)

Power games

Some people view power as a game. What is the power game? A power game is the interaction of dominance and prevention within different areas of life. As mediators and conflict coaches, we encourage people to seek empowerment, as empowerment is a form of collaborative power. We believe that through working together, people are more likely to have both of their needs and interests met.  This is not to say that we should not seek any form of power. Studies have shown that people using powerful language achieve credibility and are more persuasive than others. (J. Dan Rothwell)

Power in Communication

Passive Communication

Each underestimates her own power and overestimates the other's.

Deborah Tannen

Passive Communication means “not expressing genuine emotions, views, and values or sharing them with apologies, excessive justifications, and self-critical statements such that other people can discount what you think and feel. Passive communication conveys that your beliefs and emotions do not matter to others. The aim of passive communication is to avoid direct expression.” (U of New Hampshire) Powerless verbal communication is another term for passive communication.

In some ways, passive communication might be easier, as one might avoid taking responsibility for themselves and others. However, there are many problems and not asserting power in communication. Passive communication can create a great deal of resentment over the long term, as one might feel that they have compromised there needs to the benefit of someone else.

Assertive Communication

Respect your efforts, respect yourself. Self-respect leads to self-discipline. When you have both firmly under your belt, that's real power.

Clint Eastwood

Mediate to Go - Super Powers - Being powerful in relationships and organizations
Also, see our blog on being a Self-Leader in Conflict Situations

Assertive Communication means “Expressing thoughts, feelings and values directly, honestly, and respectfully. Assertive communication clearly conveys someone’s opinions and emotions and perspective. The goal of assertive communication is mutual acknowledgement and respect and compromise when there is disagreement.” (U of New Hampshire) If you are a self-leader and conflict situations, you are an assertive communicator.

There is a great deal of Power in assertive communication. Others some people might have a negative association to the term assertive, assertive communication is collaborative in nature. To be assertive is to be authentic and open about what you need, while respecting the boundaries of others, and wanting the best for them as well.

Aggressive Communication

Power is dangerous unless you have humility.

Richard J. Daley

Aggressive communication means “expressing opinions and emotions directly but dishonestly and/or disrespectfully. Aggressive communication conveys that what the other person wishes, feels and thinks is unimportant enough to be dismissed. The goal of aggressive communication is to win and dominate.” (U of New Hampshire)

Aggressive communication is all about competitive power and the power games. How can I win? What can I do to dominate the other person? How can I take revenge? Another problem with aggressive communication is that a “win” does not lead to positive relationships in the future. While one might feel that they’re powerful on the circumstances, this might backfire.

Conclusion

We have all heard the terms, power game, powerhouse and power up. For some,  especially passive communicators, asserting power is uncomfortable. For others, especially aggressive communicators, asserting power is almost too comfortable, given that it is at the expense of others. As mediators and conflict coaches, we recognize the importance of power in human relationships.

Power is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, groups and their members required power in order to achieve their goals. How can groups achieve their goals and effectively manage conflict? The most appropriate form of power is empowerment, which is based on collaboration. The best way to achieve empowerment is through assertive communication.

Power and powerless quotes

Knowledge is power.

Francis Bacon

Satire is traditionally the weapon of the powerless against the powerful.

Molly Ivins

Washing one's hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with the powerful, not to be neutral.

Paulo Freire

We mostly feel fearful because we feel powerless. We feel powerless, I contend, because of a style of thinking that splits information in two poles that makes us lose all the operative information we need to solve the problem.

Patricia Sun

People who are powerless make an open theater of violence.

Don DeLillo

References

J. Dan Rothwell, In Mixed Company: Communicating in Small Groups and Teams, Thompson Wadsworth

The article by the U of New Hampshire was “Adapted from Lange & Jakubowsk (1978), as well as handouts from Missouri University of Science and Technology, University of Wisconsin Eau Claire, Massey University, and the University of Kansas.”

Revenge

Revenge is a Dish Best Not Served

Revenge

Introduction to Revenge

I can nearly guarantee that you have felt vengeful at some point in your life.  It is arguably a natural emotional response when we perceive that an injustice has been done to us.  Retribution, justice, or payback are terms sometimes used to disguise or even justify feelings of vengeance and the desire to have a wrongdoer made to suffer for their actions.  There is, of course, a difference between standing up for yourself and being malicious or antagonistic, but it can sometimes be difficult to gauge where to draw the line.  If you feel you’ve been wronged, what is the appropriate course of action?

Recognize the Feeling of Revenge

The desire for revenge is an untrustworthy emotion. As an example, there is evidence that shows that years after the offense, the satisfaction of victims’ feelings of revenge are not typically related to the severity of the punishment of the criminal.  Shortly after the time of conviction, victims were more likely to say that they felt their vengeful feelings were satisfied, but this oscillated more rapidly and was unpredictable between and within individuals. Many people think that seeking vengeance will make them feel better, or bring resolution to their problem.  In fact, it appears that this is not the case, and that unleashing aggression or retribution on someone who has wronged you may have no cathartic effect at all – and in fact it can lead to further feelings of aggression.   One possible explanation for this is that the injustice remains current (for both the offender and the “avenger”), and it detracts from the ability of the offended party to trivialize and move on from the original injustice.   Further, it is unlikely that the original offender will take any vengeful acts lightly.  There is a real danger in perpetuating a cycle of revenge, with potentially destructive costs to all involved.  

 

Consider the Cost of Revenge

In any dispute, it is common to see parties who want revenge.  One main way in which this manifests is in a Pyrrhic Victory, a “win” that is so costly, time-consuming, or relationship-damaging that it is tantamount to defeat.  It is important to watch out for this and to guard against heading down a path that leads to one.  It is unfortunate that sometimes injustices occur.  And no, it is not always the best advice to allow injustices to go unnoticed or ignored.  But it is equally important to remember all of the costs and efforts, including the mental strain and lost peace of mind that can come from a drawn-out dispute, and these tend to be even more pronounced if the relationship is very antagonistic. It is also important to consider these costs in the context of your particular situation.  Whatever injustice you have suffered may feel amplified if the perpetrator was a friend, family member, or any other person in which you held trust.  Take into account the effect that a soured relationship may have on your other relationships, including ones that may not have developed yet! Is it really worth it?

Revenge 

Strategies to Deal with “Revenge”

If you are feeling vengeful, it may be helpful to step back and consider all available options.  Every situation and relationship is different, and it can help to come to terms with the problem if you consider what could occur next. Start by considering what you would ideally like to get out of the situation. Ask yourself the reasons why, and try to imagine what the consequences could be if you got exactly what you are asking for.  Seeking outside help can be very useful in getting to the root of the issue. This could be in the form of a lawyer, a mediator, the police (if the matter is criminal), or even a medical professional. These are especially important if the issue is time-sensitive.  Speaking to someone who may be able to give you advice – even a friend or family member – is a great start.  It may help to simply have your feelings of injustice affirmed or shared.  If possible, you may wish to simply wait and reflect for some time, even if this means not contacting a family member or friend who has hurt you somehow.

It is unfortunate that sometimes, wrongs occur for which there is no apparent remedy, no “next step” that can be a distinct marker of resolution.  Sometimes this marker does not materialize immediately, and sometimes it has little to do with the effort or thought you can put into it. Vengeance, however, is untrustworthy, and a misleading hook on which to hang your dispute resolution strategy.  


Author

Dan Lawlor is a Mediate2go Blogger focused on estates and commercial dispute resolution. Dan is a graduate of McGill University's Faculty of Law with interests in conflict resolution, business law and writing. He played an important role as a director with Mediation at McGill, building connections with the community to improve outreach. Currently he is a student-at-law with Campbell Mihailovich Uggenti LLP in Hamilton, Ontario. Dan loves team sports, reading, and traveling.

Conflict is good for business. Conflict resolution and innovation go hand-in-hand.

Conflict is a good for business. Conflict can be transformed to help you meet business objectives.

Mediate2go.com: Conflict is good for business - Innovation and Change

Studies reveal that conflict has major impacts on organizations, employees and managers. (CPP Global Human Capital Report) Here are some examples, which also explain why individuals and organizations generally view conflict as a bad thing, something that should be avoided.

Costs to Organizations:

• Employees spend an average of 2-3 hours per week dealing with conflict
• Conflict leads to High Turnover and Lower Recruitment,
• Project Failure,
• Cross-Departmental Problems and
• Tarnished Public Image

Costs to Individuals:

• Stress,
• De-motivation,
• Anger and Frustration,
• Nervousness,
• Sleeplessness,
• Sickness,
• Damaged Reputation,
• Leading to Absence,
• Termination and
• Resignation.

Sadly, most organizations avoid conflict in the hope that it will go away on its own, or employees will deal with it themselves. This is likely to worsen the situation and lead to conflict escalation. Furthermore, it denies the possibility that conflict can be used to improve organizational output. 

Conflict, if managed effectively, can actually improve a business or organization. Here are some results: (See CPP Global Human Capital Report)

Mediate2go.com: Conflict is good for business - Innovation and Change

1. Better understanding of others (41%)
2. Improved working relationships (33%)
3. Better solutions to problems and challenges (29%)
4. Higher performance in the team (21%)
5. Increased Motivation (18%)
6. Major Innovation (9%)

As we can see, managing conflict can actually improve your working context and company overall. It might even give you an edge over the competition. Considering that teams can better understand one another, they will be more likely to communicate effectively during meetings, and therefore more capable to exchange information. Relationships are improved, so individuals will more freely share their innovative ideas and express themselves, all of which is data that is vital to effectively meeting organizational goals. 

Through improved communication, problems and challenges can be more easily managed, some of which might lead to expensive results if not handled otherwise. Teams perform more effectively, and teams are motivated, so leadership can delegate more work to the team and focus on other more strategic tasks. Major innovation also results through effective conflict management, which makes sense given that employees and managers feel a sense of loyalty to an organization that helps them effectively manage their conflict.

See our blog on building an internal conflict resolution system or strategy.