Stages of Conflict

Are you looking to learn more about the stages of conflict?

Introduction to Stages of Conflict

A great source to start to understand conflict, and specifically the stages of conflict, is the article by Louis R. Pondy, entitled Organizational Conflict: Concepts and Models (Administrative Science Quarterly, Vol. 12, No. 2 (Sep., 1967), pp. 296-320). Although the article is from the 1960s, the analysis is still applicable today, whether with respect to a conflict in the workplace, a separation or divorce or an international dispute. 

Be sure to see our blog on Levels of Conflict, which compliments the information here about stages of conflict.

Defining conflict

Conflict cannot be simply defined as some of the manifestations of conflict, like anger, stress or even behaviour such as hitting someone. Pondy suggests that conflict is best understood as a dynamic process made of a series of ‘conflict episodes’.

Pondy likens the definition of conflict to the definition of decision-making. In decision-making, the individual makes a commitment to a course of action gradually, often with multiple steps along the way. Conflict is no different, but takes place through “gradual escalation to a state of disorder”. He stated that the climax of decision-making is choice, and that the climax of conflict is open aggression. Fortunately, he notes that not every conflict leads to open aggression. This makes sense - think of all of the times that you have had disagreements with someone but they simple end with you saying “let’s agree to disagree”, or you noticed the conditions that could lead to a difficult conflict, and finally things “blow over” and lead to there being no conflict at all. For example, that time that someone took your place in line at the café, but then realized it, apologized, and went to the end of the line.

Stages of Conflict

1. Latent Conflict

There may be multiple forms of latent conflict that are present before a conflict episode. Latent conflict may include, for example,

• Competition for scarce resources (ie. there is only one job position being advertised but two of us are applying),
• Autonomy control (ie. my manager is micro-managing me and I need freedom, or for the Trekkie fans, “Resistence is futile”). Also see our blog on bad bosses and hostile environments.
• Goal divergence (ie. my colleague and I were put on a task group together, but we cannot reach a decision together)

2. Perceived Conflict

Conflict may exist with or without the perception of those involved. For example, there might be situations where people perceive conflict to exist, but after speaking, they realize that there was indeed no difference in opinions, and in fact, no conflict whatsoever. In this case, the stages of conflict do not proceed. This type of perception issue can be resolved through improved communication. See our blogs on Trust and Communication.

However, conflict may not be perceived or noticed when it actually exists. To become felt conflict, it must be perceived in some way. On the topic of hidden conflict, see our blogs on fearing conflict and conflict avoidance.

3. Felt Conflict

This stage of conflict is also known as the personalization of conflict, where conflict that is perceived, ends up having an impact on the person. The American recording artist Monica stated, “Don’t take it personal” - if someone were able to not take a situation personally, then it would mean that even if there were latent and perceived conflict, the conflict would not progress to the “Felt Conflict” stage. 

You may have felt this in your personal life, whereby you cognitively understand that there is a conflict between you and someone else, but you simply don’t care. In other words, long hair don't care; an expression which “emphasizes that the speaker isn't affected by what is meant as an insult but actually embraces the accusation”.

4. Manifest Conflict 

This stage is about conflict behaviours, which may be as overt as physical and verbal violence (see when fights goes bad), and as covert as sabotage, apathy or gossip. In order to understand if conflict has manifested, it is important to look at the context of the conflict. His article does however state that conflict is not manifested if one party is not aware that their behaviour frustrates the other person involved. This is where communicating with someone can make a difference in bringing that conflict to the surface, or by accessing the help of a mediator or conflict coach to assist you in addressing the conflict, when dealing with someone who is unaware of the impact of their behaviour, or if they are aware, but are unwilling to collaborate with you (see our blogs on Avoidance and Feeling uncomfortable? Set a Boundary). Although not mentioned in Pondy’s article, it might be useful to do a “perception check”, verifying whether or not your perception of the other person’s behaviour is based on an actual or mere perceived conflict.

5. Conflict Aftermath

If a conflict is resolved based on the interests and needs of all of those involved, then the parties may lay the foundation for a collaborative and healthy relationship (see our blog on when to choose therapy and when to divorce). However, if parties avoid issues, and the conflict is merely suppressed but not resolved, the latent conditions of conflict may be aggravated and explode in more serious form until they are rectified or until the relationship dissolves”. See our blogs on Conflict Escalation and Ending Blame and Defensiveness in Relationships. This reminds us that addressing conflict in a constructive way can lay the groundwork for healthy and happy relationships in the future.

Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love. 

Martin Luther King, Jr. 

Conclusion about the Stages of Conflict

The stages of conflict help us look at conflict differently. Conflict is not simply the behaviour that relates to our perceptions of conflict. Conflict involves the context, situation or as we call it here, the conditions that lead to conflict. Conflict then needs to be perceived, and depending on whether we feel impacted by it or not, it then must be felt. Finally, when we are aware that we are impacting the other person, but we continue to act in the same way, there is manifest conflict. The same applies for when someone else is the one perceiving, feeling or acting. The key take-away is that we have a great deal of choice in how we prevent conflict, both before, during and after the conflict, based on the groundwork we lay. There are many stages at which we may intervene in a situation, or change our own reactions in a situation (see our blog on how to be confident - building an emotional air conditioner), to impact whether a conflict goes bad (when fightsgo bad) or whether it is resolved effectively (see top 10 tips to resolve conflict).

Conflict Resolution for Managers: Make conflict management a strategic priority

Conflict Resolution for Managers: How managers can make conflict management a strategic priority

Mediate2go: Conflict Resolution for Managers: Make conflict management a strategic priority

Introduction - Conflict Management in the Workplace

Managers reported spending 18% to 26% of their time dealing with conflict in the workplace (Thomas and Schmidt, 1976). Enormous investment with resources and time are spent dealing with conflict in the workplace. Middle managers are often the frontline and first responders toward attempting to resolve employee conflict. The effects of conflict not only take time from the staff involved, but also contribute to increasing sick days/absence, decreasing morale, creating a negative culture, and impeding efficiency and productivity. Nonetheless, not all conflict in the workplace is negative (see our blog on how conflict is good for business and innovation. Conflict can be productive and promote growth at all levels. Accordingly, conflict can be constructive and resolve a number of issues by producing high quality decisions and result in learning and innovation. 

To make conflict management a strategic priority, organizational leadership must do some preparation to better inform themselves, and to use the knowledge gained to take action. In order to make conflict management a strategic priority, agencies can do the following.

Mediate2go: Conflict Resolution for Managers: Make conflict management a strategic priority

Steps to make conflict management a strategic priority

Define conflict in the workplace

In order for the workplace to understand conflict; all employees must be conflict literate. Again, not all conflict is bad, and employees must come to an understanding that conflict can be positive and productive. Our blogs about conflict escalation and taking self leadership in conflict explain how to make positive a good thing.

Take Action: 

In the next team meeting, put conflict management as an agenda item for discussion, allocate 5-10 minutes to have a general discussion. A goal for the discussion could be developing a list of negative and positive conflicts in the workplace, and further analyzing what are advantages and disadvantages of conflict in the work place. Depending on the energy of conversation, propose continuing the discussion of conflict management at the next team meeting. Recommend that your team read the blog on conflict management styles.

Investing in conflict management training

There are a number of trainings and personality tests that can be done in the workplace to help inform employees about their conflict management style and personality as it relates to conflict. Generally these assessments have a cost, and following the training, much of the knowledge gained is lost, because managers do not utilize the learning into supervision, appraisals and team meetings. Nevertheless, managers need to take an active role and utilize the learning to identify the employees style of conflict, and to develop a common framework for their team. Ask for the help of a conflict resolution expert, coach or mediator to help integrate conflict management into your organizational processes.

Take Action:  

The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI) is an assessment tool that can be used to identify the different styles of conflict among staff. The TKI is a self-reported assessment that allows employees to discover whether they are overusing or under using one or more of five conflict- handling modes: competing, collaborating, compromising, avoiding, and accommodating. By discussing the different conflict styles, employees will begin to frame and define their conflict styles, and relate it to the workplace. Starting with such a framework will help increase knowledge with employees about conflict styles. We’ve developed an easy to read blog with songs to demonstrate each conflict management style.

Note: If your organization has limited funding, contact a mediator or conflict coach in the area who might be able to provide training at a discounted rate.           

Acknowledge and measure on conflict skills:

Managers need to play an active role by identifying, building, and coaching conflict management styles and improved performance with staff. Measurement and indicators are incredibly important to determine growth and opportunity. Managers can utilize assessments, such as TKI to bring to light different conflict-handling modes, and to develop competencies and goals around utilizing the styles. Accountability is important for growth, so the manager should continue to follow through and measure performance. The TKI should be used as a ‘carrot’ as opposed to a ‘stick’. Employees need positive encouragement and coaching/supervision sessions to ensure they are on the right track.

Take Action: 

If the team has gone through a TKI assessment, review individual TKI reports with staff. Engage in a discussion about their thoughts concerning the report, and develop an action plan for growth. The employee must be confident and informed about the items and skills they need to work on. The manager can help develop indicators and goals to measure performance to determine growth. In the event that a TKI assessment is not available, the manager can openly discuss conflict styles in the workplace, and identify general positive or negative challenges that the staff person is facing. Read this blog as a resource.

Making conflict management a strategic priority

In a workplace setting where there is an absence of a positive culture of conflict, it would be difficult for a manager to involve top management to add conflict management as a strategic priority right away. If managers decide to ‘pilot’ a positive conflict culture on their team, there will be positive outcomes and measures that stand out compared to other departments. Making conflict management a goal for a team will result in high performance. Moreover, encouraging and fostering a positive conflict culture that addresses each level of conflict will help contribute to reducing sick days and absenteeism, increase morale, create a vibrant positive culture, and increase efficiency and productivity.  These outcomes will draw attention to the team, and managers will have better evidence for top managers to consider making a conflict management a strategic priority.

Take Action:  

It is important for high performing and positive conflict management teams to lead. Although top management may not initially be receptive to making conflict management a priority, managers have a great opportunity to demonstrate the positive outcomes from their teams that have a strong conflict management approach. Measurement will be an important influencer to making a good argument with top management. In order to ensure that the argument is strong, managers must define conflict on their team, invest in conflict training, acknowledge and measure conflict skills, and make their team stand with their positive outcomes of being a positive conflict team. Check out a list of professionals in your area that may provide conflict resolution training.

Evan - Mediate2go Public Health Blogger

For the past 10 years, Evan Muller-Cheng has worked in a variety of community based and social service settings that ranged from Police Services, Federal and Municipal governments, and non-profits. Evan has a graduate degree from The University of Ottawa in Criminology, and a Master’s of Health Administration at the University of Toronto. Currently, Evan is the Manager of Community Initiatives with Agincourt Community Services Association (ACSA). Specifically, Evan’s portfolio includes overseeing a community centre, food security programming, a Scarborough youth in conflict with the law program, and overseeing over 30 communities based, youth based social enterprise, and a micro grant distribution program. For fun, Evan bikes, cooks and makes everyone smile at ACSA.

Conflict Management Styles

Conflict Management Styles

Conflict Management Definition

Conflict management is the process of limiting the negative aspects of conflict while increasing the positive aspects of conflict (Wikipedia). Often, conflict is viewed as negative interactions that are destructive to relationships (read about Why do we stay in destructive relationships?). However, if conflict is managed effectively, it can have a positive impact on people, relationships and conflict can even be good for business.

Conflict Management Styles Blog - Introduction

I'm dealing with a conflict. What should I do?

This is the essential question of any person who is seeking to resolve a conflict in their life.

Most conflicts have numerous possible outcomes.  For most of us, however, it may seem like there is only one choice, or maybe a handful of choices.  Sometimes none of them are very appealing.  For the purposes of this post, I assume mainly that we are talking about interpersonal conflicts, perhaps with friends, co-workers (see also Workplace Conflict), or family members (see also Family Fights), and particularly ones that are non-violent or personally threatening in nature. Please always remember to contact the appropriate authorities if you are in any personal danger. See also, what to do if you are in a destructive relationship.

This blog post is based around the Thomas-Kilmann theory of conflict resolution.  You can read more about it here. Also, check out our blog on Songs about Conflict Management Styles and Songs about Conflict.

Conflict Management Styles - The TKI Model

The conflict management styles are divided into 5 groups that represent different ways of addressing or failing to address conflict. To determine your conflict management style, you need to complete the TKI instrument.

The context can help determine the right strategy to approach, manage and resolve the conflict. However, across situations, you may consider the style of conflict management, such as the styles outlined by the Thomas-Kilmann Instrument. These styles are “Competing (assertive, uncooperative), Avoiding (unassertive, uncooperative), Accommodating (unassertive, cooperative), Collaborating (assertive, cooperative), and Compromising (intermediate assertiveness and cooperativeness)” (Wikipedia).

Even if you do not complete the assessment, the styles provide a great deal of insights into the ways people manage conflict. If you do complete the instrument, it is designed to improve your self-awareness in conflict situations.

Over time, people may see their conflict management style change over time or even situation. You might be highly effective at managing conflict with your partner, but have difficulty managing conflict in the workplace. The different styles are not necessarily good or bad, unless you need to balance your styles more appropriately. If you consider yourself a ‘yes man’, then you might be sacrificing your needs over others.

If you don’t change your conflict management style, then your style might lead you feel resentful, or it might even negatively impact your self esteem. Each style has advantages and disadvantages based on the circumstances and the levels of conflict. Some advantages might appear to be negative, but they might be necessary. For example, the competing style might appear to be negative, but might be necessary in cases when you cannot accommodate others in any way, like in matters of personal safety.

If you have a conflict, read about the definition of trust, how to build trust, how to fix a relationship, and the top 10 steps to resolve your conflict.

Conflict Management Style - Avoidance

A first step in any conflict can just be to confront the binary of action versus inaction.  Avoidance is one method of conflict management.  There may be times when avoidance is the most appropriate solution.  This may apply in “pick your battles”- type situations, such as where another person is posturing or being antagonistic for reasons or results that ultimately will not affect you. If we assume, however, that the other parties have a meaningful relationship with you, avoiding a problem between you is not typically a great idea.  Sometimes it leads to the problem festering, or blaming each other, especially if no one takes responsibility (see also Self-Leadership in Conflict Resolution). The results can be harmful and damaging (see also Conflict Escalation).

Considering that avoidance typically requires the least physical or mental effort, it is easy to allow avoidance to set in unconsciously.  If there is a particular issue that needs to be addressed, ask yourself how long it has gone unaddressed.  Is there anything in particular you are waiting on? Is it possible to take control of the situation, or do you require additional input? Do you need the help of a conflict coach to try to better understand the situation? Is it a matter of not wanting to move forward (see also How to Move On), or a matter of truly not being able to? If the latter, could it ever get to the point of being addressable or resolvable?

Finally, even if the proper solution to a conflict is avoidance, it may be helpful to reconcile with yourself why this is the case.  Perhaps you need to tell yourself once-and-for-all that it isn’t worth worrying about, and thus the problem can be left in the past. In other words, you need to set some interpersonal and personal boundaries to resolve conflict. Perhaps this may mean signaling this to others: “I’m sorry, but really don’t feel this is my responsibility.”; “I am not willing to move ahead with this.”  Acknowledging to yourself that this is an appropriate solution may also help you move past the conflict.

Conflict Management Style - Accommodating

When you accommodate someone else, you give in and allow the other party to have their way. By definition, it involves some sort of forfeiture of your position (see also Negotiation Defined). This is not necessarily a bad thing, and, like avoiding, accommodation can be of practical use. Think carefully about whether this matter is a battle worth fighting.  One upside may be that you can maintain a relationship with someone who cares far more about the conflict than you do, or who may perceive the matter to be more important than you do.

Downsides can include feelings of resentment or dislike towards the other party.  Also, if accommodation is your go-to tactic, you run the risk of being taken advantage of over a longer period or for a series of conflicts with the same person.  If the stakes in the conflict are very high from your perspective, accommodating and admitting defeat is likely not a good idea.

Conflict Management Style - Competing

A competitive stance is the opposite of accommodation, where you refuse to give in. This is a good style to use when the issue is very important to you and when the outcome is significant.  A good example might be enforcing your legal rights if someone has harmed you or rather obviously broken an agreement (See Contract Negotiation Tips).

Being overly competitive has its risks as well. It could earn you or your organization a reputation for being uncooperative or petty.  Insisting on a competitive stance can also lead to Pyrrhic victories, where the cost of “winning” is so great that no real benefit is obtained for anyone.

Conflict Management Style - Compromising

A compromise necessarily entails the parties’ failing to fulfill what they each truly want, and instead forego some aspects of their intended result to appease the other.  This can be viewed as a partial loss from the perspective of both sides.  It can be appropriate when more time or information is needed to reach a final resolution, when there is no reasonable prospect of collaboration, or when the two parties cannot agree and yet must work together.

The problem with compromising is that it can become a crutch, an easy-way to (perhaps begrudgingly) move forward without considering better options. Parties that find themselves continuously compromising should beware of developing this habit. It can also lead to the parties repeatedly misleading others (or even themselves) about their true expectations or needs, because they count on being let down.

Conflict Management Style - Collaboration

Collaboration is in many cases a desirable outcome.  It results in “win-win” scenarios and can help all parties move forward content. It can also potentially lead to creative solutions that neither side had considered before.  Sometimes, the whole is worth more than the sum of its parts.

Dangers with collaboration include the fact that the parties typically must trust each other enough to reach out and share the burden of the conflict (see How to Build Trust).  This may not even be possible if, for example, there is a duty of confidentiality owed to someone involved.  There also may not be enough time or resources available for this method to be practical.

Conflict Management Style - Conclusion

These are the five general styles of the Thomas-Killmann model.  Note that any of these styles can shift into the other modes depending on circumstances. 

Dan Lawlor - Mediate2go Editor and Blogger

Dan Lawlor is a Mediate to Go Blogger focused on estates and commercial dispute resolution. Dan is a graduate of McGill University's Faculty of Law with interests in conflict resolution, business law and writing. He played an important role as a director with Mediation at McGill, building connections with the community to improve outreach. Currently he is an Associate Lawyer with Campbell Mihailovich Uggenti LLP in Hamilton, Ontario. Dan loves team sports, reading, and traveling.

Conflict Resolution -Top 8 tips to resolve conflict

Conflict Resolution -Top 8 tips to resolve conflict

Conflict Resolution -Top 10 tips to resolve conflict from Mediate to Go

Introduction to Conflict Resolution

Man must evolve for all human conflict, a method which rejects revenge, aggression and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Definition of Conflict

What is conflict? Conflict means “discord of action, feeling, or effect; antagonism or opposition, as of interests or principles”, and an “incompatibility or interference, as of one idea, desire, event, or activity with another”  (Dictionary.com). Other words for conflict include collision and opposition. Conflict often leads to a great deal of pain, leaving people wanting inner peace.

Areas and levels of conflict

Conflict can take place in interpersonal relationships within the family and in the outside world, and at various other levels, including intrapersonal conflict (conflict within the self), departmental, organizational, community-based, regional-based, national and international conflicts.

Often, conflicts take place at varying levels at the same time. For example, you might have a conflict at work with a colleague, but at the same time, the organization, by failing to address the issue right away, creates a conflict between yourself and the organization. Here are some examples of levels of conflict in an organizational setting.

Conflict Escalation

The most challenging part of conflict relates to conflict escalation. Typically, conflict escalates between parties so that issues become bigger than necessary, parties become increasingly angry with one another, they focus on blaming each other and issues become increasingly complex and difficult to resolve. Even if parties want to fix the relationship, it becomes increasingly difficult.

Ways to address conflict. Formal vs. Informal (alternative dispute resolution)

In many areas of life, the traditional way of resolving an issue was to fight in court. Whether its divorce or a workplace dispute, parties would file a complaint or an action in court to address the issue. This type of approach, including labour arbitration, is adversarial, rights based and more formal. Parties ask a third party to make a decision, often leading to a win-lose situation. Read about the differences between mediation and arbitration. On the other hand, conflict resolution is now more about alternative dispute resolution, this means issues are addressed outside of formalized processes. Parties try to fix their relationship and resolve issues in a non-adversarial way, and only resort to a formal approach if the informal is unsuccessful.

Top 10 tips to resolve conflict

1. Don’t avoid the conflict. You might fear conflict and confrontation due to a fear of being rejected. Conflict can be positive for you, your relationships and your organization. Conflict can actually be good for business, leading to innovation. The key is to build your confidence to address the issue. Know that everything will work out.
2. Manage your anger. Take some time to breath, relax and reflect, if you feel you might explode. Ideally, you bring up your feelings immediately in the situation, if you feel safe. However, there is nothing wrong with finding the right time to discuss an issue. This can reduce the likelihood of escalation.
3. Reflect, don’t blame. We have the tendency to blame others. If you try hard, you can put yourself in the other’s shoes. What might they have felt in the situation? How would it have felt for them. It’s uncomfortable, but put time and effort into this.
4. Don’t stay if it’s a destructive relationship. Is the conflict reoccurring? Think about whether the conflict is destructive. Sometimes we stay in destructive relationships, but no matter the resolution, it will be short lived without addressing the deeper issues. If you can’t decide if you should divorce or not, read about how to choose between mediation and therapy.
5. Learn about negotiation and how to negotiate. Often, conflict resolution requires people to negotiate to ask what they are looking for.
6. Confront the person in a respectful way. We call this a constructive confrontation, where we prepare to discuss our concerns with someone in a respectful way, focusing on our feelings, not blaming the other.
7. Take leadership in the situation. Become a self-leader in conflict resolution. To be a self-leader, you need to be powerful. Follow our LEADER acronym to address issues effectively to resolve conflicts in your life.
8. Learn about conflict resolution and how to fix a relationship. Listen to our Top 10 songs about conflict to learn about typical types of conflict, and ways that people typically resolve issues.

Labour Arbitration

Labour Arbitration

Introduction to arbitration 

Arbitration is the most common method of resolving disputes in unionized workplaces, and is called for in collective agreements – the negotiated contract between employees (represented by their union) and employers.  

Arbitration vs mediation

Prior to an arbitration process, parties may attempt to resolve their issues via an informal workplace mediation process. Read about the differences between mediation and arbitration.

Arbitration clauses

These agreements almost always contain sections that call for a third party decision maker (arbitrator) to decide the outcome of unresolved disputes between the parties, so that every little disagreement does not end in a strike or a lock-out.  Where such a provision is not in a collective agreement, the law in most, if not all, jurisdictions in Canada mandates that a section requiring arbitration be deemed to be included in the agreement.  For example, in Ontario, if an agreement does not contain such a provision, the law requires that following clause be deemed to be a part of it:

“Where a difference arises between the parties relating to the interpretation, application or administration of this agreement, including any question as to whether a matter is arbitrable, or where an allegation is made that this agreement has been violated, either of the parties may after exhausting any grievance procedure established by this agreement, notify the other party in writing of its desire to submit the difference or allegation to arbitration…”
 (Labour Relations Act, 1995, SO 1995, c 1, Sch A, s.48(2))

Grievances leading to arbitration

Where an individual employee or the union as a whole believes that the employer has violated the collective agreement, a “grievance” may be filed by the union.  The grievance will state what has been done wrong, and what the complainant believes the remedy should be if the grievance succeeds.  

Arbitration process

Where the dispute is not resolved once the employer has considered the grievance, and depending on the specific process laid out in the collective agreement, the issue will go before an arbitrator to resolve.  The arbitration process is similar to court, with one or more adjudicators hearing the case and determining the outcome.  The union and employer may have lawyers representing them.  The arbitrator(s) may be agreed upon by the parties, or may be appointed by the Minister for labour in that jurisdiction.  Evidence will be provided to the arbitrator(s) to consider, and witnesses will often be called.  

Arbitration proceedings

However, the proceedings are much more informal than in court.  An arbitration will often be held in a boardroom or office, and normal court rules are generally more lax.  An arbitrator will most often release his or her decision must faster than a court would.  Furthermore, given that the parties will likely have had a long history of bargaining together or of prior arbitrations, they may agree to certain aspects of the case without conflict so as to speed up the process, and ask the arbitrator to merely focus on one or more of the most contentious issues.

Binding decision

The decision of the arbitrator will be binding.  While the losing party may appeal the decision in court (called “judicial review”), labour arbitrators are given much leeway for their specialized knowledge in the field, and often the outcome of the arbitration will only be overturned if it is outside the scope of what could be considered a reasonable decision.

Conclusion about labour arbitration

Arbitrations in labour law are extremely common, and this method of dispute resolution has taken immense pressure off of the court system.  Most issues can be solved efficiently and cheaply in this way. 

About the blogger: workplace arbitration

Johanna Willows, Labour Law Blogger

Johanna Willows is a lawyer in Winnipeg, representing unions and individual employees. Johanna received her law degree from the University of Ottawa in 2013. She received several awards upon graduation for her work and extracurriculars in labour, employment, and human rights law, and was recently awarded the Manitoba Bar Association Pro Bono award. 

Conflict Escalation - Easy steps to manage and resolve your conflicts.

Conflict Escalation - Easy steps to manage and resolve your conflicts.

Mediate to Go: Conflict can escalate easily if we don't address it appropriately.

Blog on Conflict Escalation

This blog is about the conflict process model by Morton Deutsch. His work, also known to some as the conflict escalation model or used as a conflict diagnostic model, can help parties learn more about the conflict escalation process and what one can do to increase the likelihood of effective conflict resolution and conflict management. 

Introduction to Conflict Escalation

In order to effectively manage conflict , one must better understand the dynamics of conflict escalation. Conflict can be a normal and healthy part of any relationship.  Workplace conflict, if managed effectively, can be good for business.  Differences in perceptions can improve problem-solving and increase innovation. Personal conflicts, such as conflict in the family, can help people determine their values and ask for what they need. In order for conflict to be a positive thing, one must manage the process of conflict so that it does not lead to conflict escalation.

What is conflict escalation?

Morton Deutsch, a pivotal leader in the field of conflict resolution, psychology and education described conflict escalation in detail. In his view, conflict at times may become destructive,  ”by a tendency to expand and escalate”. Conflict escalation is a negative process of conflict.

Deutsch stated,

The tendency to escalate conflict results from the conjunction of three interrelated processes:

1.     Competitive processes involved in the attempt to win the conflict;

2.     Processes of misperception and biased perception; and

3.     Processes of commitment arising out of the pressures for cognitive and social consistency. These processes give rise to a mutually reinforcing cycle of relations that generate actions and reactions that intensify the conflict. (direct quote, p. 352)

Limiting conflict escalation?

Other processes may have the effect of limiting conflict escalation. However, if they are weak, conflict may escalate. Other processes that might lead to conflict escalation if they are weak include:

4.     The number and strength of the existing cooperatives bonds;

5.     Cross cutting identifications;

6.     Common allegiances and memberships among the conflicting parties;

7.     The existence of values, institutions, procedures, and groups that are organized to help limit and regulate conflict; and

8.     The salience and significance of the costs of intensifying conflict. (direct quote, p. 352)

Unfortunately, ”Even if [these] are strong, misjudgment and the pressures arising out of tendencies to be rigidly self-consistent may make it difficult to keep a competitive conflict encapsulated.” (p.352) In sum, limiting conflict escalation requires a great deal of effort for mediators, conflict coaches, and parties facing conflict. One basic way of stopping conflict escalation is through ending blame and defensiveness.

Process of Conflict

Destructive process of conflict

Conflict, if not managed effectively, leads to a process of conflict that is destructive. Some destructive conflict is also characteristic in destructive relationships and revenge. Deutsch stated the following characteristics of the processes of conflict when it becomes destructive,

• The initial cause of the conflict is forgotten or becomes irrelevant;
• The issues expand in size and number;
• More people become involved in the conflict;
• The precedents and principles which appear to be bad issue increase;
• Parties are willing to absorb a higher cost;
• Negative attitudes towards the other side are intensified;
• Parties rely more on power, and “upon the tactics of threats, coercion, and deception”. (direct quote, p. 352-3)

Constructive process of conflict

An ideal process of conflict resolution involves the use of ”Persuasion and from the tactics of conciliation, minimization of differences, and enhancement of mutual understanding and goodwill.” (p.352) These there just a few ways to move constructive conflicts from escalation to resolution.

For Deutsch and others in the field of conflict resolution, constructive processes of conflict resolution we’re based on three key features; creative thinking, cooperative problem-solving, benevolent misperception and cooperative commitment. (p. 360-365)

Creative thinking

“[O]ne of the creative functions of conflict resides in its ability to arouse motivation to solve a problem that might otherwise go unattended.” (p. 361) In order to facilitate creative reactions to problems requires that people do not feel in anyway threatened and they are tolerant of ambiguity and open the unknown. (361) 

In order to increase the possibility of a constructive process of conflict resolution, we must create a safe space and help ourselves and others feel motivated to address the conflict. Mediators and conflict coaches must constantly ensure that parties feel safe and comfortable, as a means of improving creative outcomes to a conflict – hence,  a major benefit of using mediation services.

Cooperative problem-solving

“In a cooperative context, the conflict can be viewed as a common problem in which the conflicting parties have the joint interest of reaching a mutually satisfactory solution.” (p. 363-4) Cooperation has many positive impacts that can lead to a more constructive process of conflict resolution. Deutsche found the following:

·      Open communication is facilitated between the parties which increases the exchange of information, helping parties address the real issues of the conflict;

·      Each side is recognized as having legitimate interests and the need to find a solution that addresses these;

·      Trust and friendliness improves, which helps parties be sensitive to their similarities and shared concerns and downplays their differences. (p. 363-4)

Benevolent misperception

“Cooperation tends to minimize differences and enhances the perception of the others' benevolence.” This means, if parties are overall more cooperative, they’re more likely to see the other person as having good intentions. Deutsche also mentioned some shortcomings of this, if parties do not address all of their issues.  However, benevolent misperception can increase the likelihood of cooperative conflict resolution. As a result, we recommend facilitating a cooperative environment, be it in a professional or personal context.

Cooperative commitment

For better in some cases, ”[p]ast investments, already established facilities, procedures and institutions, Obligations to third parties, and situational pressures may operate to bind one to a cooperative relationship.” (p. 364) This means that ”[t]he bonds of a cooperative relationship maybe cemented in loyalty, obligation, conformity, guilt, or convenience as well as in personal attachment and personal gain.” (p. 365)

The question then becomes, does the end justify the means? It seems that more adversarial forms of negotiation (see also negotiation tactics) would tend to use some of these means to encourage the resolution of the conflict. However, if parties are not fully motivated to abide by the resolution, or their feelings of loyalty, attachment, guilt or notions of personal gain change, the resolution might be at risk. As conflict resolution experts, we recommend that parties do their best to address the root of the issues at hand to prevent social conflict escalation and a stalemate.

Conflict management and conflict resolution

Taking self-leadership in conflict situations also means learning about conflict escalation and how to reduce the likelihood of fights going bad - destructive conflict. 

Mediate2go: Don't escalate conflict - be a self-leader

You might ask yourself, what is destructive conflict at home or what is destructive conflict at work, and how can it be resolved?

To effectively manage or resolve a conflict, one must do their best to prevent the conflict from escalating. The conflict escalation process can decrease the likelihood of parties finding a means of collaborating and resolving their shared issues together. In some ways, addressing the stages of a conflict through addressing the conflict escalation process is a way to resolve conflict in itself.

What does this mean for you? You need to know how to manage conflicts at work? How to address the conflict within your family?  Here are some recommendations;

• Create a supportive and safe environment, so that people do not feel threatened;
• Encourage a cooperative environment through the use of activities to build trust and positive relationships;
• Even if you disagree with the other person, recognize that they have legitimate interests and concerns;
• Build relationships with an authentic intent to treat others with respect and dignity. Be open and honest with your needs and concerns, and help them feel comfortable to do the same with you;
• Read about taking self-leadership in conflictsituations, how to fix a relationship, fight fair, active listening and how to build and maintain trust.

Deutsch, M. 1973. Conflicts: Productive and destructive. In Conflict resolution through communication, edited by F. E. Jandt. New York: Harper & Row. 

Some links on conflict escalation:

Wikipedia

Beyond Intractability

U of Oregon

Keywords: Conflict de escalation, de escalating conflict, it escalation process,