What is Conflict? Don't let fights go bad.

What is conflict? Don’t let fights go bad. Conflict may be defined as an incompatibility of values, beliefs, interests and/or positions. [i] But are conflicts truly caused by an incompatibility, or simply a perception thereof? What is conflict? Can conflict be a good thing? When you think of the word conflict, what do you feel? Stress, worry, discomfort…? If you have experienced destructive conflict, these strong emotions are understandable. As mediators, we prefer to see conflict as an opportunity for positive change, whether it is personal, relational, organizational, or societal in nature. We believe that conflict is a normal and healthy part of our lives in relationships, families, workplaces and communities. Conflict may present itself due to real or perceived incompatibilities between those involved, but conflict needn’t be destructive. So, we must ask ourselves, what makes one type of conflict destructive and the other constructive? One of the founding researchers in conflict r