Sunday, April 15, 2018

Celebrities and Mediation – What Is The Link?

Ola! Hope you guys are still having a read of my blogs, and perhaps this one caught your attention. Throughout history, there have been disagreements, conflicts and a need for mediation. As history goes on, it has simply been thrust into greater prominence. Singers, actors and public figures are constantly thrust into the limelight and scrutinised.

Whether you are talking about legendary feuds, such as that between Betty Davis and Joan Crawford, or feuds in more modern pop culture, such as the conflicts between Taylor Swift and Katy Perry, there seems to be much need for mediation in Hollywood.

The question I pose to you is this; are celebrities and their disagreements really as epic as the media makes them out to be? Are they heavily exaggerated, and modern media simply does it for the money? Or perhaps it is a mix between the two, with both parties at fault (see conflict escalation)?

Below I will write about a few celebrities I believe have caused a lot of conflict, either between each other, the media or even everyday viewers and consumers (see levels of conflict). I will give you a brief overview of the ‘issue’ and some insight on both possible successful conflict resolution techniques for their situations, as well as bringing back to the question raised above. I ask you to read this with an open mind.

Betty Davis + Joan Crawford


For all you classic Hollywood lovers, this particular feud is notorious. In fact, Ryan Murphy has recently released a season of his new anthology series ‘Feud’, which focuses on this particular feud. This feud was between two actresses, and apparently lasted both of their lifetimes.

Although it is an extremely long story, it started when Betty Davis was only beginning to come into prominence. One of her new movies was near to release, but was overshadowed by Joan Crawford’s recent divorce. As time went on, this intensified, especially as Betty Davis began to become more successful than Crawford. This feud came to a head in the movie ‘Whatever Happened To Baby Jane’, where they hurt each other in a show of destructive conflict, perhaps on purpose and argued constantly.

I believe mediation could have definitely been a successful technique in this situation. Judging on what we know via the media, it seems as if this feud came from jealousy of one another and their talent. However, the truth was that they were both quite talented. I believe a discussion about their issues face-to-face; perhaps with a third party involved would have been a good start. In terms of the issues on set, I believe compromise could have been the best option. Offering an increase in pay for a better attitude as an incentive, or a decrease for hindering the process would have done the trick, or at the least influenced the parties in their decision to try to resolve the conflict.

Do I think this feud was exaggerated and blown out of proportion? I believe so. I don’t believe they got along, but most articles that I have researched regarding this feud are filled with ‘they could’ or ‘it is assumed’. A lot of the feud was also based on third hand accounts, which could have been exaggerated or taken out of context. It could have also been a more fun rivalry between the two, or genuine conflict escalation.



Britney Spears and Conflict



Although Britney Spears could cover many different types of conflict (she could be the topic of an article within itself!), I am going to focus on her conflicts with the media itself, and the media industry she works in.

Although she was a member of the Mickey Mouse club, she truly came into prominence in 1998, with her first hit single “…Baby One More Time”. Throughout her career, she has been known for her up-tempo numbers, and her dancing skills. However, she has always been heavily scrutinized by the media, whether regarding her relationships, sometimes provocative manner and singing ability.

This conflict with the media came to a head in 2007, when she has a mental breakdown, resulting in her losing custody of her children, shaving her head and being caught fleeing the scene of a hit-and-run. As a result, the media came down even harder on her, to the point where she attacked them physically, most notably with an umbrella (video below).


Britney’s Conflict with the Paparazzi

Britney Spears had a rocky relationship with the paparazzi, and when it reaches a head in which physical conflict seems like the only answer, there is most defiantly a problem. Although many celebrities may not admit it, the paparazzi are vital to them in order to keep them relevant and interesting, considering the amount of famous singers, actors and public figures nowadays. At the same time, paparazzi need celebrities for their pay check, as well as to keep themselves relevant, edgy and interesting within their industry. An almost co-dependent relationship (see also unhealthy relationships).

Although it is never right for a conflict to become physical in any circumstance, we can empathize with Britney’s feelings (not actions) in the situation. I could tell you about conflict resolution and mediation techniques in this situation that are certainly relevant if this situation were on a smaller scale. An apology on both sides and discussions with a neutral third party regarding how they could have a comfortable working relationship would be very useful in this situation. And perhaps if, in your workplace or life, there is a similar problem on a smaller scale, this would be a great option. However, for THIS situation, it is not realistic. There is no one person that represents all the media in the world, so conflict resoution becomes more practicable.

And so we return to my starting question, whether this rocky relationship is as serious as it is made out to be, or if it is exaggerated. In this situation, I believe it was serious. Britney Spears was going through a mental breakdown at the time, and she felt that physical conflict would be a successful technique to create space between the paparazzi and her. This is not a smart or responsible technique, but she was on the edge and perhaps not in the right frame of mind. Besides, there was photo evidence!!!

Tom Cruise; when Conflict Resolution can’t work.



I know. The majority of people hear this name and smack their heads against the wall. This particular conflict is based around a variety of conflicts, both within the media and the public.

The story is simple. In a nutshell, Tom Cruise identifies as a Scientologist. I personally do not judge people based on their religions, I believe you can be whoever you want to be. However, his religion caused backlash in the public eye, as well as within the press. At the same time, this brought Scientology into the limelight, causing an increase in conversions.

To be honest, religion is close to people and may seem part of people’s identities. When mediating a situation involving religion, you might always be walking on eggshells, hense, the need to understand people’s human needs an ensure that the mediation environment is respectful. Cruise’s situation is another case whereby mediation techniques aren’t realistic. For example, perhaps the conflict could have been averted if people observed privacy around religious issues; however that defeats the purpose of paparazzi. I guess the advice to give for a workplace conflict involving religion is simply setting down rules with both parties that your personal life shouldn’t affect professionalism within the workplace. At the same time, encouraging respect and understanding between everyone in the process so that they are valued for their diversity.

Was this issue over-exaggerated, resulting in an overreaction from the public? I personally believe the answer is no. The reason for this opinion is because Tom Cruise was merely a catalyst that thrust Scientology into the limelight, a controversial religion to say the least! He was criticized mainly because of his high profile status, and the negative effects his association could have in terms of sign-ups.

Judy Garland and Intra-personal Conflict




The story of Judy Garland is a sad one, and the conflict I am focusing on in this section is the conflict within her, and how that was perceived within the media.

I don’t know why the stories about old Hollywood stars seem to be lengthier, but Judy Garland is another lady with a long history, so I will briefly skim the details. Miss Garland has a tough childhood, and from a young age she was thrust into the limelight. She was very successful, however over time she began to deteriorate, resulting in issues such as not turning up to set. Eventually, stress and depression led to her early death.

In terms of conflict resolution, multiple attempts were made to help her. She saw a therapist often, sometimes twice a day, and she had taken multiple trips to rehabilitation centres to attempt to wean her off her vices. I believe compromises were made, however she could not comply. The only option that did not take place was a leave of absence from acting or a more permanent stay in a rehabilitation centre, which I believe was most likely the family’s next move. Conflict resolution is only possible when parties are healthy in a wholeistic sense. Taking leave is common to return to health, which may in turn, help in resolving issues internally and with others.

I believe that the media was putting her in the wrong light. They were portraying her as a diva, rather than a celebrity with some serious problems. This led to misconceptions by the public of her being spoilt. This was not so much an exaggeration as an assumption without reliable sources or backup for their claims. In the end, it seems that her deeper needs were not being recognized by the media, whether their recognition would help, that is another story.

Miley Cyrus and Conflict Resolution



I thought to end on a bit on a more positive note; I would finish on Miley Cyrus, a young lady who is always the victim of controversy, with the main source of conflict being with the public. I will discuss her behaviour and some tips to address inappropriate actions, but in a workplace context.

As the daughter of a famous singer (Billy-Ray Cyrus), Miley was exposed to the public from a young age. As a teen, she was recruited for Disney Channel’s ‘Hannah Montana’. Through this role, she became a role model for many. Once she was released from her contract, she changed her look and attitude significantly. Whether she was smoking weed, swinging naked on a wrecking ball or twerking on Robin Thicke, she was stirring strong emotions (like AND dislike) throughout pop culture (watch video below).

Although I personally believe she was not at all in the wrong, I will go through some possible mediation techniques you could use within your workplace to address this behaviour, as it would be inappropriate in that setting. As an employer, you would have to be firm. Set down ground rules (or boundaries) as soon as you set up your business (or once you read this), so if this happens, you can refer back to these rules. Compromise in this situation would give those in a lesser position power over you, and although every member of a team relies on each other, the chain of command should always be maintained. This discussion should be calm, and I believe it would be appropriate to have a third, neutral party. Also see our blogs on how to fix conflict (or a relationship).

I believe this situation was blown out of proportion by both the media and consumers. Parents for example, complained about their children being tainted by her actions, and that her concerts were inappropriate. However, this information is readily available through magazines and the internet, so if they were worried about it being inappropriate, perhaps they should not have brought their children tickets in the first place. Miley Cyrus was trying out a new look and personality, as most teens her age do, and yet she was held to a different standard than others.


Thank you for reading. If you have any comments, opinions or advice, I would love to hear from you in the comments below!


Ashton Bult, Mediate to Go Blogger

Ashton Bult is our media blogger, focusing on mediation and conflict resolution and its effects on modern pop culture and vice versa. Leaning towards youth engagement with mediation, he has studied a wide variety of courses at the Auckland University of Technology and the International Travel College. When he isn't on his computer, he'll be performing on stage. 

Saturday, December 23, 2017

Christmas Cheer or Mediation Madness: Your Survival Guide to December




Christmas is just around the corner, and guess what, most of us survived (ish). I would like to start off by saying congratulations on that, an achievement in itself!

However many people may claim that Christmas is always “full of cheer”, so to speak, in my opinion they are extremely confused about the true meaning of Christmas. Workplace mediation is in my opinion, more important in December than in any other month of the year, for a variety of reasons. Even if people don’t celebrate Christmas, December  is the time of many celebrations, which may be joyous, and unfortunately at times, conflictual.

My first reason is simple; December is one of the most stressful times of year. Whether you have a family of your own, a partner or simply love to pull out the stops for Christmas, you have a huge amount of work to do. And that’s not even counting your ACTUAL workplace. The fact that the business shuts down, even if just for a few days, can be a blessed holiday for some, but a nightmare for others. Work deadlines, meetings and other events are tighter, which can create even more stress and conflict within the workplace.

Below I have put some stressful December situations that could create conflict within the workplace, and how to de-escalate these situations, through the use of conflict resolution (self-resolution, conflict coaching and mediation).

The Horrors of Secret Santa

Secret Santa is an inspired idea. People buying gifts for one another, making everybody feel like part of the team. It also gets people into the Christmas spirit. However, you will also receive these sorts of issues:

“I don’t like my person, I want another!” “I have no idea who my person is because I don’t care about my co-workers…..so yeah….” “Secret Santa is stupid, and I don’t want to do it!” “I don’t have the time.”

I’m sure you get the point. You are always going to get these situations with something like ‘Secret Santa’, and this can cause tension within the office. In some cases, this can escalate to arguments and very uncomfortable situations that we would all rather avoid.

You are never going to make everybody happy in any situation, and the best thing you can do in this situation is compromise, a textbook conflict management style. My first piece of advice would be to set a budget for the gifts, so that people aren’t spending ridiculous amounts of money on their gifts. Something else that could help is on the paper you hand out, alongside the name; write down their department, or even a picture of the person. These sorts of things can help a lot more than you might expect. Lastly, set parameters on the types of gifts so that people do not give or receive gifts inappropriate in the workplace. See also our blog on conflict resolution for managers.

As for those who have complaints about Secret Santa or the process, simply explain things from your perspective, the reasons you wanted to do it, and what you hope to get from the process. If you have an answer ready, in all honesty they can still decline without looking like a Scrooge. Ask for how they want to be involved in order to get their support and buy-in, or to simply include them in a way that makes them more comfortable.

Leave/Holidays and Conflict

This one is a toughie. Whether it’s about completing those horrific holiday deadlines or every employee attempting to get work leave around December/January, there’s going to be conflict, whether you want it or not. Everybody wants family time, everybody wants to go on a trip, and you can’t just shut down the office to make allowances, sorry to say.

This one comes down to tough love, good communication and planning ahead. If you don’t tell them, you should. It could be a case of first in first served, and if you have already used up all your leave, pushing your luck will not work during the Christmas period. Although compromise and meeting in the middle is usually the best option, in these situations you need to set down the rules firmly, so any issues or complaints are not on your head, but theirs for not keeping in mind those boundaries you set down.

The Dreaded Staff Party

This particular horror causes conflict mostly between those in higher-tier positions. This is because it is due to the more technical aspects associated with a staff party. Variables such as budget, alcohol, venues and events can cause high stress levels, and disagreements. There is also a constant worry that the co-workers might be unhappy with the event, and this can cause long-term resentment of their job positions. I will deal with these issues one at a time. 

VENUE to avoid conflict during workplace parties

It is a tough call. Should it be done off-site, or should we book out a venue? Booking a venue is often the biggest source of conflict in terms of the staff party, as it would be the biggest blow to the budget. First of all, you should sit down with the accountant and discuss the budget you have. It isn’t about the venue, it’s about what you do with it. Decorations and food can go a long way. Every business is different, but if you ask those obvious questions, there will be no need for conflict in the first place. The party is one way to show appreciation and recognition for hard work, so a better venue shows employees that you care and value their contribution.

ALCOHOL and avoiding conflict during workplace parties

Alcohol nearly always leads to conflict. Whether it is someone acting like a fool, a thoughtless comment or office gossip, something always happens. I work in events, and my staff party secret is serving wine and beer ONLY, and keep an eye on both the employees, managers and the rate of consumption. This will save you both money out of your budget, and possible conflict management needed further down the track. Make sure that someone in HR or a manager is there to offer sober support should anything escalate or get out of hand. Also be considerate that some people might be uncomfortable with the consumption of alcohol for religious reasons, so be sure to help them feel included. 

EVENTS and avoiding conflict during workplace parties 

Events have winners and losers. Some people are graceful, some people are not. It does not mean that you are a bad person; personally I believe that being ambitious and having a competitive personality can be a real asset within the workplace. However, this can often lead to unintentionally hurting people, and thus begins a deadly cycle that leads to a conflicted workplace. Firstly, the party itself is a big event, so to be honest, you do not need to go overboard in terms of events.

Staff parties are a great idea and bring people together, but keep in mind preparation is everything, and have some alternate options in place, because you can never be too careful when it comes to conflict resolution and workplace mediation.

The Christmas Blues, dealing with family and personal conflict during the holidays

Although by reading this blog you may think I am the Grinch in disguise, I truly am a big fan of Christmas. Whether it is the decorations, the carolling or the presents, I have a good time. However, what people often fail to remember is that not everybody is a fan of Christmas. This could be due to a lot of things, whether it is religious, family and personal conflict, well being, situational or they are simply not a fan of the holidays.

This can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation from their co-workers and peers, or vice versa. Although this conflict might not be shown in open and explicit conflict, it is still very important to consider, if not more so.

Don’t block them out and exclude anyone. This can cause deep conflict between both parties or even within the so-called “Scrooge” themselves. There could be bad memories associated with Christmas. They might be all alone this year. They simply might not celebrate the holiday. This doesn’t mean they are bad people, or that you should exclude them from everything in December.

Think of how you would want to be treated if you were in their shoes. Include them, but keep in mind their boundaries. You should always respect your fellow co-workers, and just because it’s December, does not mean that should change.

Anyway, if you have actually read through all of this, congratulations!!! I hope I have given you some useful tips for dealing with Christmas conflict. Leave some comments below (I’d love to hear what you think), and of course, have a very, VERY merry Christmas!!!

Ashton, Mediate2go Communications Blogger

Ashton Bult is a graduate of tourism studies, with a strong interest in media outreach. He spends his free time winning water polo games and reading several books a week. Ashton also acts, dances and choreographs in a Drama club in Auckland. He is currently working on a cruise ship.




Saturday, January 30, 2016

Building Great Relationships on your Board of Directors


Building Great Relationships on your Board of Directors – What you can do to have effective relationship and manage conflict when serving on a Board of Directors (BOG)


Background of Conflict Resolution and Board of Directors/Boards of Governors


Are you a director or executive member of a non-profit organization or corporation? Do you have a conflict on your Board of Directors? 

As a facilitator and conflict resolution expert, I focus my work on volunteer Boards of Directors. I wrote this blog for anyone interested or involved in serving on an agency board.  Conflict is an important part of growing a strong board, listening to different perspectives from the community and helping an organization have a positive impact on the community (read conflict is good for business). Planning ahead to understand what conflict could look like, having an agreed upon process for resolution and learning how to use the process is a valuable skill to develop as a board member.  When you master conflict resolution and integrate it into your work, you improve the chances that your agency will achieve its overall goals.

Introduction to Conflict Resolution and Board of Directors


Serving on a Board of Directors for a not-for-profit agency is an excellent opportunity make a contribution to the community.  You can shape the future of the organization by making a contribution of your time, expertise and knowledge.  The ability to identify and resolve conflict is a necessary skill. There are different types of disputes you can experience on a Board.  Some can be resolved quickly and others will require a process for resolution.  This post will outline four things you can do to establish a framework to make conflict resolution work for your Board of Directors.

1.     Establish a Dispute Resolution Policy

     The Board Dispute Resolution Policy should outline the process for identifying, addressing and resolving a dispute that involves board members or their single employee (e.g., CEO, Executive Director).  The policy should state that dispute resolution is an important tool for the Board to use when there are significant issues that appear to be difficult to resolve.


The document should include the following elements:


b.     The process for the resolution of the conflict

c.     The phase in the resolution process (e.g. negotiation, mediation)

d.     Who should be involved from the board to assist with the process

e.     If outside assistance is required, who will be involved

f.      A method to record lessons learned

g.     A date for the annual review of the policy

h.    The dispute management process. 

Building a policy should be based on the literature and well-known tools for effective negotiation and dispute resolution. See the Meditate2Go blog on creating an organizational dispute resolution program and policy.

2.     Board Orientation and Continuing Education

     Training and education should support the policy.  The annual Board Meeting schedule should incorporate training. Everyone should have an opportunity refine and develop their skills to identify conflict, apply the conflict resolution tools and obtain feedback. The learning process can utilize a wide variety of methods including case studies, role plays or guest speakers.  Actively engaging the board members in the learning process is the key to success.


3.     Apply the Tools for Emerging Challenges and Opportunities

     Every organization faces a wide variety of challenges and opportunities.  The challenges can consist of conflicts between board members, with staff or with other agencies in the community [1]. The opportunities will often present themselves as a chance to expand existing services, create new services or build new facilitates.  Negotiation and conflict resolution tools can be helpful to build partnerships and find solutions to challenges or opportunities. Applying the tools as a Board is a positive way to strengthen relationships in the community and find new and innovative ways to work with other organizations.  See the Meditate2Go blog on Interest-Based Approach to help your Board work with other agencies in the community.


4.     Engage the Local Mediation Community

     Every community has a rich resource of people trained and willing to assign an organization with dispute resolution training, mediation, and effective conflict coaching.  Learn about the mediators in your community.  A strategic partnership local mediators can help the organization develop healthy relationships in the community, provide a framework for exploring new ideas among groups and assist the Board in moving forward with challenges and opportunities.


The Board of Directors is a critical element in the long-term success of community agency.  Building excellent relationships between board members will involve having a framework for identifying and resolution disputes.  Establishing a Board policy, engaging in ongoing training, using the dispute resolution tools and partnering with mediation experts in the community can make your time on Board a constructive and positive experience.  Good luck as you play a critical role in the community as a member of the Board of Directors.

Contact the Mediate2go Blogger:


Jerry Mings is a facilitator and mediator with enormous experience in the health and social sector. His work is focused on Boards and Senior Teams as they work in the areas of organizational priorities, dispute resolution strategies and effective community partnership opportunities. With over 18 years of practice, his work has involved national health  charities,  government funded organizations and private sector service firms. In addition, Jerry designs public participation systems and asynchronous facilitation methods using the Internet.



[1] Marion peters Angelica, “Resolving Board Conflicts” (1999) The Grantsmanship Center. 


The Tipping Point of Mediation, Conflict Coaching and Resolution


Reflection of The Tipping Point by a Mediator
- How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference

The Tipping Point, By Malcolm Gladwell

Blog by Wayne Marriott

“The tipping point is that magic moment when an idea, trend, or social behaviour crosses a threshold, tips, and spreads like wildfire. Just as a single sick person can start an epidemic of the flu, so too can a small but precisely targeted push cause a fashion trend, the popularity of a new product, or a drop in the crime rate. This widely acclaimed bestseller, in which Malcolm Gladwell explores and brilliantly illuminates the tipping point phenomenon, is already changing the way people throughout the world think about selling products and disseminating ideas.”

Having read the book some years hence, I sought out the audio version of this valuable gem. This following information is my review of the book for your enjoyment. I hope it whets your appetite sufficiently to seek your own copy and enjoy Gladwell’s writing as much as I have.
You can find the iTunes version of the book here.

So, why should conflict management practitioners take on Gladwell’s glad-tidings?

I’m a conflict resolution service provider. My unique skill and ability is for sale. Regrettably the craft of practitioners like me is undervalued by a market sector that believe when they get into conflict, the dispute belongs to the other party and seldom accept much personal responsibility in the cause nor the resolution of their dispute. “I’m not in dispute. I’m right and they are wrong”. I find most of my clientele have become so immersed in their dispute they can no longer see a way through. In their exhaustion, they simply transfer responsibility of resolution to a lawyer or worse still, rollover allowing the other party to exert more power than should normally be afforded to them.  All of this can lead to destructive conflict escalation.

I’ve been searching for an edge toward success in my conflict management practice. Something that I could use as a guide in the market place frequented by fickle and grumpy consumers who don’t yet know what they need, nor want. How can I help people overcome this conflict blindness? What marketing ideas will create a change in the way consumers deal with dispute? I see this book as a tool to reflect and find a solution to improve my conflict resolution practice.

Biography of an idea – 4 principles

The Tipping Point described by Gladwell is the biography of an idea. For the communication of an idea (the message) to create change: the messenger must be a connector; the message must be in context and the message needs to stick, that is, personal, memorable, and practical. Simplistic, the change must be the easiest option.
As conflict resolution practitioners, we can harness Gladwell’s vision to help guide a personal business approach to transform our practice and strengthen our industry with strategies designed to build capability across our client sector, communities, organization, etc.

Important ideas that provoke change demonstrate 4 principles:
1.    Associated with contagious behaviour
2.   Little change = big effect
3.   Significant change will occur in one dramatic moment
4.   Principle 4 -  making sense of 1 and 2 above in these four parts:
                                              i.     Demonstrates geometric progression like that of a viral epidemic
                                            ii.     The unexpected must be expected – where radical change is more than a possibility
                                          iii.     There are three agents of change.
                                          iv.     Word of mouth epidemics become extraordinary news.

Agents of change

The three agents of change are essential elements of ideas that provoke social change are:
1.    The law of the few – key people who demonstrate: exceptional skills; energy; sociable nature and knowledge. Gladwell calls them:
a.    Connectors
b.    Mavens
c.    Salesmen (although I prefer to describe these folk as persuaders)
2.   The stickiness factor – ideas that make an impact (change behaviour) and stay top of mind (popular across the culture)
3.   The power of context – where the tipping point is reached owing to tinkering with even the smallest detail.

The law of the few – who are they and what do they offer?

The success of any social epidemic is heavily dependent on people with a particular set of skills. Change will occur more readily when these three specialist come together. Gladwell makes clear that these few do not exist in every team, community or organization. With this in mind we must remember that teams, communities and organizations must ensure these exceptional skills are present. For sole practitioners who beat a solitary drum and attempt to develop the entire skill set, an important lesson is to collaborate with key people to ensure the tipping point is reached and change assured.
Gladwell defines Connector; Mavens and Persuaders as follows:
a.    Connectors AKA people specialists.
These folk have great contacts. They prove, it’s not what you know but who you know. They give the rest of us access to opportunities and worlds that we ordinarily don’t belong. Effective people specialists rank highly in a six degrees of separation where not all the degrees are equal. Gladwell describes the circle of friends is actually a pyramid where key individuals simply know lots of people of all different ilk and move between cultures with ease. He says that weak ties can net more worth than strong ties. This means that our acquaintances are stronger allies than our friends and relatives. (Gladwell discusses his six degrees theory  and Kevin Bacon here http://gladwell.com/six-degrees-of-lois-weisberg/ )
b.    Mavens AKA information specialists.
These folk are accumulators of knowledge. We rely on mavens as information brokers. They are the experts in their field and we pay them tremendous respect as our go-to people on specifics topics. Gladwell says that mavens’ are socially motivated and seldom demonstrate strength in persuasion.
c.    Persuaders AKA communication specialists.
Tuned in to cultural micro-rhythms, persuaders demonstrate mastery of a specialized human trait where listening and intervention is as synchronous as a conductor of an orchestra. With perfect timing, they listen, interrupt and become interactional as if in tune with most everyone they meet.

When Mavens and Connectors amongst us get together.

Importantly, mavens demonstrate success when they collaborate with connectors who are innovators. Connector-innovators are trend setters. They often feel they are isolated – even outcasts. They are also pioneers who see a bigger picture. They are passionate and readily become engaged in various forms of activism.

When mavens and connector-innovators get together a more coherent picture comes clear. The fresh broadened view ensures a more complete analysis is not influenced by those with an insular and biased outlook.

Maybe this is why conflict management innovators (or any professional group or social enterprise) are more often engaged in change processes across their sector. They create change by incremental steps that might otherwise not seem connected. The resulting tipping point comes with radical and rapid change to the surprise of those around them whilst the pioneers go unrecognized.

If this is you, (pat on back) then you will already be broadening the scope of your craft to provide consumers with flexibility, strengthening the action of your profession and changing culture. You will be making change the easy choice, as Gladwell suggests, redefining innovation as mainstream. See the Mediate2Go blog on enhancing customer service in conflict resolution.

Afterword by Malcolm Gladwell.

“A book is a living and breathing document that grows richer with each new reading”. Malcolm Gladwell.
An added strength of the audio version is Gladwell’s personal afterword where he shares fresh insight into his vision. He says that:
         i.         Difficult and challenging change is best tackled by a close knit group.
       ii.         An increasing significance of the social media culture means we must rely more on the power of word-of –mouth of our mavens, connectors and persuaders.

He also says that since writing The Tipping Point he can add fresh insight.
1.    Understanding the rise of isolation.
2.   Beware the rise of immunity.
3.   Finding the mavens.

1.    Understanding the rise of isolation.
Individuals these days seem to follow an internal cultural script where they are infected by the example of how others experience and react to conflict and dispute. The resulting contagious behaviour in the population requires a counter response toward the tipping point to conflict competence.  Only then will we overcome our underlying anxieties that fuel unhealthy hysterical social behaviour.

2.    Beware the rise of immunity.
The power of word-of-mouth becomes more valuable as the message epidemic is prolonged. This is counter-intuitive to normal economics where scarcity drives an increase in value and wealth.  Gladwell opines that increasing network size is self-limiting as we become immune to the share volume of messages directed at us about more things we have little interest in. The key to reducing immunity is to reach people face-to-face.  This relies on us valuing those in our teams, communities and organizations we respect  admire and trust. The cure for immunity is engaging with our mavens, connectors and persuaders.

3.    Finding the mavens.

Gladwell calls it, “creating the maven trap”.

People look up to mavens, connectors and persuaders (The law of the few) because they naturally value respect and standing amongst friends and colleagues. They are less impressed with status and wealth. In particular the mavens we value are able to break through the rising tide of isolation and immunity because:
  •    Mavens prefer direct communication, face-to-face.
  •    Word-of-mouth messages will be carefully constructed to attract the maven group in each sector, community and organization.

Gladwell suggests that finding and collaborating with a widened maven group will hasten the process toward the tipping point of change.
What ideas and great works are you considering? Can you identify the mavens are around you? When will you formalize a strategy to bring together your connectors, mavens and persuaders?

How to use Gladwell’s book to improve conflict resolution for both clients and mediators.

My mission from now is to consider my colleagues in terms of Gladwell’s classification.
1.    Write a list of colleagues you admire and respect and consider if they are mavens, connectors or persuaders. (Many of these folk will have strengths in each)
2.   Make a plan on making contact with each individual and set about securing a face to face meeting with them.
3.   Use the meeting to gather information about their values. Talk with them about what you are working on and introduce the Gladwell readings.
4.   Ask questions such as:
1.    What values do mediators share? (This is your maven trap – mavens will wax lyrical on their view of this.)
2.   What stifles referrals and business development? (see best business ideas for mediators)
3.   Without undermining the competitive nature of our practice, how can we work together to grow the size of the referrals pie?
4.   Would you be willing to join a think tank / working party to discuss 1, 2 and 3 above?
5.   Then plan and implement your think tank meeting with your mavens, connectors and persuaders. Have them consider:
6.   What would it be like to work together?
7.   Which environments are in most need of transformation?
8.   What challenges will we face?
9.   How will we overcome the challenges?
10. How will we know we are making a difference?
11.What commitments do we need to make together to take another step? (Who, what, how, when, why)
Whilst our mediation colleagues are for in intents and purposes competitors for a fairly limited pie of referrals, by embracing Gladwell’s concepts we can work together to grow the size of the pie. By working together our client base can encompass a broadened foundation of communities, sectors and organizations that will benefit from embracing their own mavens, connectors and persuaders. They simply need our guidance to show them.

Connect with Wayne Marriott, Mediator

For more information, please read Malcolm Gladwell’s book, The Tipping Point.

 

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